First of all, I want to offer the most sincere of Thank Yous to everyone who read my piece in xoJane this week. And a friendly high five to the 390 (and counting) people who shared it somewhere out into the interwebs. And this non-touchy-feely writer would like to offer a warm and friendly side hug to all of the lovely folks who took the time to leave a comment on my story. (Maybe even a full-on hug for some of you sweet people)
Before my post went live, I had a momentary panic full of “WHAT HAVE I DONE?” after reading the comments sections of some other essays I’ve seen around the ‘net. It’s no secret that people can be impressively awful in those comboxes, and I was wishing I had some Xanax or whatever it is the panic-stricken take these days lying about.
But it was so great. Seriously. People were so supportive, complimentary, positive, affirming, etc. What a wonderful way to be.
But a couple of people wanted to know how I could see my dad as selfless. They weren’t mean about asking at all, but it was mentioned in a few spots, both in the comments section and on fb posts, so I wanted to issue a small postscript to my story in the hopes that people can find a way to trust my take, even if we are only connected through their readership.
So here you go:
When you have 1200 or so words to work with, there is only so much you can say. Only so much you can include. I alluded to my father’s difficult life before the tragic loss of my mother, but I couldn’t flesh it out. So there’s that. And I also couldn’t manage to fit all the times my dad was there for me. The time he called me at college because he had heard my boyfriend broke up with me and he just knew it had to be a misunderstanding because I was so wonderful. The time he schlepped us up to Sesame Place so I could run around all day long, the countless times he told me he loved me and how proud he was of me. You can’t fit all that stuff into 1200 words. There’s no word count high enough, really. I just want everyone to know that it’s alright if you don’t understand, I can appreciate that.
But I’m the one who needs to understand that my father was selfless. And I do.